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Downtown

The Girl and I decided to go downtown this afternoon and explore. After a visit to the library, we wound up at Springwood Cemetery in downtown Greenville. It was there; we were there — why not?

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I couldn’t remember if the Girl had ever been in a cemetery before. I recalled a visit to a cemetery in Rock Hill, but she stayed in the car.

“But I’ve been in a cemetery in Poland,” she assured me.

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We quickly learned this cemetery was different, really a cemetery worth visiting. It wasn’t one of those modern graveyards with flat grave markers to make mowing easier. This cemetery had worn stones and wrought iron fences.

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And a number of plots for unknown Confederate soldiers.

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The past is truly never too far away when you’re in the South. Those of us from the South face a lot of stereotypes as a result, not all of them completely unearned. I’ve never had much of an accent at all, let alone a southern accent, but I still felt somewhat out of place during my two years in Boston. As we walked around, words from that modern, proud redneck band, Drive-by Truckers, came to mind:

You think I’m dumb, maybe not too bright
You wonder how I sleep at night
Proud of the glory, stare down the shame
Duality of the southern thing

I can’t say I’ve ever been proud of the glory, but I’ve done my share of staring down the shame.

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Perhaps that’s the modern southern thing?

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Whatever the case, I didn’t have long to settle on those thoughts: we were soon walking down Main Street (literally), weaving in and out of fellow Greenville-ites also out to enjoy the warm Saturday, snapping pictures here and there. The Girl has begun requesting pictures — and posing — so I willingly complied.

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I wanted to walk all the way down to Falls Park, but with K and the Boy back home, we decided to head back.

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Board

It’s one of the highlights of the year for me as a teacher. After working (some might say “struggling”) our way the Odyssey, I surprise students with the culminating project: a board game based on Odysseus’s adventures. They think it’s fun; I design the details of the assignment to require some real problem-solving practice, legitimate “technical” writing (they have to create instructions for their game, and they must be clear enough that other groups can play without their help), and some creativity.

Today, they played the game.

Students playing peers’ board game

I walked around, snapping pictures, listening in on conversations, smiling when they get so involved in the whole procedure that they don’t even notice me, don’t even remember they’re also supposed to be evaluating the projects as well.

It’s a good day to be in the classroom.

Entertaining

With some help, the Boy can now sit. He casts his eyes here and there, his attention drawn to this sound or that motion, and his arms or legs are constantly in motion. It seems like it would be a good match for the hyper Girl.

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They sit together, banging anything and everything, both delighted with the racket.

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The difference comes later, when the Boy has a moment alone and sits silently, almost contemplatively, for a seemingly impossible length of time. The Girl wouldn’t last three seconds.

Dominoes

The Girl has learned how to play dominoes — at least, a version of Mexican Train from a set with missing pieces. She generally tends to place her tiles on the table face up because, as she explains, she needs help. I tell her that perhaps it’s best if I don’t see what she has because it’s tempting to make decisions based on that knowledge.

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“Good luck, sis!”

Still, she does need the help. She often overlooks playable tiles and tends to draw without really thinking. And then there’s her tendency to get ahead of herself — a less magnanimous father would say “cheat” — and slip another tile down before I play.

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“Um, I might have gone a different direction, Tata.”

In the end, the Girl wins, semi-fair-and-square. I’m fairly sure there were a couple of times she played twice while I was wrestling the Boy. Then again, I know of at least one time she missed a tile and I said nothing. Perhaps I was desperate to make a decent showing.

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Three consecutive doubles: 10, 11, and 12.

Then again, when I draw these three tiles toward the end of the game, one can hardly fault me, I think.

Serenade

The Boy is ready to eat; K doesn’t have his food ready yet. There’s only one thing to do.

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The Girl and I keep him happy.

Current Obsession

This is the song that the Girl, through her enthusiastic, dramatic singing, has drilled into my head, K’s head, and likely little E’s head.

“Honey, could you sing a different song?” is our little refrain to this particular number.

Change

I go to Mass tonight alone because K has already been in an effort to keep our sick son in the house as much as possible. The entrance processional is a rousing hymn complete with drum accompaniment. The tell-tale “tat-tat-tat” of the high-hat cymbal gives it away before the full beat begins, and I realize what has happened: I’ve inadvertently come to a youth Mass. Sure enough, when the lector approaches, he’s wearing jeans and a tee-shirt. The rat-tat-tat of drums continues at times when it seems it really shouldn’t, like the Sanctus and the Agnus Dei. During the consecration of the host, I begin to wonder if the altar boy will ring the altar bell: “Perhaps the percussionist will give three good crashes on the cymbal” I think. Mercifully, that doesn’t happen, but by then, it’s too late. Despite my best efforts to focus on why I’m at Mass, I’m irritated and feeling that I’m almost physically having to resist the urge to march over to the drummer, rip the drumsticks out of her hands, and walk back to my seat. I feel I’m at some Benny Hinn camp meeting rather than Catholic Mass, and that eats at me.

Back at home, K and I talk about that. “If that’s what it takes to get the kids interested,” she suggests, “if it helps, then I don’t have a problem with it. I don’t like it, but I understand.”

But what does it help? Attendance? Perhaps. But do we really want kids coming to Mass because it’s fun, because it’s entertaining because it has just enough of a whiff of popular culture that they feel “at home”?

Shouldn’t Mass feel decidedly different? Shouldn’t we have the feeling that all of the every-day concerns and reality have drifted away for a short time? Isn’t that, at some level, the purpose of Mass? Should we be teaching our kids that, at some level, there’s not a heck of a lot of difference between Mass and a Justin Bieber show?

It makes me long for one more All Saints Day in Poland.

All Saints' 2003 II