Day: December 21, 2004

The Dirty Stairs

Part of getting ready for Christmas here is cleaning. Massive cleaning. Some people clean all the windows as well as every single rug.

But let’s not exaggerate.

My in-laws are reasonable people, and my wife is equally reasonable. But they’re still Polish, so that means a lot of cleaning. From a masculine point of view.

Today I was helping clean and was asked to do the staircase.

“Vacuum everything,” instructed my wife, as if I didn’t know how to clean stairs. “And then go back with a rag and clean all the carpets.”

Apparently, I didn’t know how to clean stairs.

“Clean all the carpets with a rag? After they’ve been vacuumed?” I asked incredulously. “What for? It’s not like it’ll make a difference!”

Long story short: we made a bet that I could skip cleaning one of the steps and she wouldn’t be able to tell which one.

Off I go, a lean-mean-clean machine.

I am a fair guy. More than fair. Hell, I even let folks do take-backs while playing chess online. So I thought, “If I’m such a sporty, fair-player sort with other people, how much more so should I be with my wife?” So, to give her a sporting chance, I didn’t clean three of the stairs.

And one of them in the most brightly lit portion of the staircase.

It could be more the effect of my testosterone level than any cultural difference, but I was sure she wouldn’t be able to find one.

The question is: how many did she find?

Singing in Class

One of the best things about being an EFL teacher is the fact that I can do “stupid” lessons and get by with it.

Like singing Christmas carols. Imagine going to math (or “maths” for those who prefer British English) class and the teacher says, “Today, we’re going to sing Christmas carols.” Even in, say, literature class it doesn’t really float.

But in English class, it does. So I teach the kids a few songs. This year:

  • We Wish You a Merry Christmas
  • Jingle Bells
  • Silent Night

Nothing special. I’ve always wanted to do “Jingle Bell Rock,” but they don’t know the melody, and that’s key. It’s a language lesson, after all, not a music class.

I can’t really recall learning Spanish Christmas carols in high school. Perhaps we did, but I have no memory of it…