The first day of a new school year is like the moment the curtain rises on a play that is often improvisational and responsive to the audience’s reaction. Each year, I reinvent myself as a teacher a little bit, especially during those first days when I’m setting a tone for the year. Always looking for that sweet spot between commander-in-chief and coach, I waver between the “don’t smile before Christmas” type of teacher and the warm-and-welcoming-almost-a-friend type of teacher. Neither is sufficient in and of itself, and I really like the coach mentality more than the authoritarian mentality, but kids will be kids, and sometimes, I have some really emotionally damaged students who add a whole new dimension and need that forceful approach — if only for a second, like a splash of cold water to get their attention — so I waver between the two in the beginning.

“Here’s the sanding block, L. I hid it!”

And yet it always depends on the class: some groups come in and I see immediately that Joey in the back is going to be a living terror if I don’t make sure I set the right tone (which might not be the authoritarian despite the initial impression that he needs a “strong hand”); other groups come in and I see, though not immediately, that there aren’t any students set on hijacking the class, and I breathe a bit easier. Still, that hint of “I can become the strictest, meanest teacher in the world if I need to” must be there, around the edges, because you never know what’s going to happen in October when the honeymoon is over.

“E, you have to hold the vacuum hose right under where I’m sanding.”

So the night before, I sit thinking about who exactly I’ll become tomorrow. I know who I’ll end up being: I have enough experience that I can get to the coach stage fairly quickly once I’ve established that I know how to drop the hammer, but those first few days — I never really know.

The magic begins tomorrow, too. I’ll see wave after wave of totally foreign faces and look at attendance sheets that are just a bunch of names, and by the end of the first quarter, I’ll be able to predict how each student is going to react to a given assignment. By the end of the semester, I’ll even know what words a given student might use.

First coat