matching tracksuits

fun in threes, sometimes fours

the boy

Trying

A busy evening for the Girl. Cross country try-outs from 6:00 to 7:15, then volleyball practice from 7:15 (obviously we were a bit late) to 8:15. Two things — sports, no less — about which she has never shown any interest until the last few weeks and now is bound and determined to participate in.

We arrived ten minutes early, and since the Girl is a rising sixth grader and most of the other kids were already attending the middle school, she stood around and looked like she felt a little lost. Friends were bantering back and forth, and she just stood and watched them.

She missed yesterday’s portion of the try-out due to her final choir concert for her elementary school, so as everyone began repeating the stretching and warm-ups from yesterday, the Girl was left looking around to see how everyone else did it. At one point, to stretch the quads, the coach told the kids to put their right hands on the shoulder of the kid to their right to help with balance. She did so, but the girl to her left didn’t put her hand on L’s shoulder. When it came time to repeat on the left side, L hesitantly reached her hand out to the girl on the left, noticed she still wasn’t balancing herself on anyone and managed to stretch without support.

How well I remember those moments of uncertainty at that age. Always looking about to make sure I’m doing what everyone else is doing. Trying hard not to call attention to myself in any way at all. Truth be told, I still behave that way in new environments with new people, but such a subdued L is an uncommon sight. I felt I was getting a little peek into what her first day of school might be like when, in a few short months, she begins middle school.

When did that happen? When did our little girl become a 5’3″ young lady who no longer looks like a little girl? I knew it was coming, but somehow I’d convinced myself it wasn’t just around the bend.

The try-out itself was instructive, for me and for L. She completed two miles in 22 minutes. It’s probably the longest distance she’s run. I sat in the car, reading (I’ve decided it’s time to reread a book that I promised myself fifteen years ago when I first read it that I would — must — read again, Steinbeck’s East of Eden), and I was aware of kids running in the field in front of the car, so I stopped and watched, waiting for the Girl. I was actually doing a bit of both, so when I didn’t see her, I just thought she’d passed by when I’d looked back down to read for a moment or two. Then I heard the kids behind me, laughing, complaining, resting. I went back to reading when a flash of blue caught my eye: L ran by, alone, dead last.

“I had terrible cramps,” she explained later.

“But do you know how proud you can be of yourself for not stopping?” I asked. It’s a big thing: our princess is learning to finish what she started, no matter what.

We jumped into the car and drove the few miles to the Y, where she’s going to be playing volleyball for the first time.

Almost everyone on the team is a complete beginner, so the coaches have to explain everything. The rules. Rotation. How to pass, to set, to serve. How to move once the ball is in play. At one point, L and a few other girls were on the sideline.

“You have to listen as I’m explaining to the other girls,” one of the coaches explains. “If you’re talking, you’ll have to run laps.”

A few minutes later, I heard him call out, “You three, take a lap!” L and two other girls began jogging around the court. I caught his eye, smiled, and gave him a thumbs up, which he returned, laughing.

After practice, I mentioned that to L: “Good job taking that lap without fussing,” I said.

“I wasn’t actually talking,” she explained. “I was just looking at the girl who was talking.”

“Better still,” I said.

That girl is maturing, I tell you.

Mother’s Day 2018

E was born the day after Mother's Day in 2012. This year, his birthday falls on the exact same day, the day after we celebrate K and Nana. So it was a long but wonderful day.

Saturday in the Yard

The bushes in front of the house had just gotten out of hand: they shaded almost 3/4 of the height of the windows in E's and L's rooms. Every time I trimmed them, K suggested that I didn't do enough, so today was the day: the bushes were getting violently trimmed.

That was to take only a couple of hours. I'd planned on mowing the backyard, trimming the bushes, mowing the front, and finishing before four. Two things slowed me down: E and the difficulty of radically trimming the bushes.

The Boy always loves helping me mow, which usually entails slipping between me and the upper bar of the lawnmower, resulting in an awkward position for me and generally slow mowing. Today it struck me: our lawnmower has rear-wheel drive, and so theoretically, the Boy could mow all by himself, with me just walking along beside to help control it.

When we got to the flattest portions of the front yard, I let him mow without my hand on the bar to guide it.

"I'll just let you mow," I said, "and then the spots you miss, you'll have to go back and get."

He loved the idea and promptly went zig-zagging across the yard. He tended to pull to the left, so he made strange arching patterns instead of the regular straight lines I obsessively put into our yard.

The period of time between the first bit of mowing and the second bit (the "flattest portions of the front yard" mentioned above) was approximately six hours, evidenced by the changing shadows in the pictures above.

In the intervening hours, we worked on the bushes. I trimmed; he loaded the cuttings into the wheelbarrow.

When we started, the foliage was so dense that it blocked most of the light and all of the sky.

When we finished, nothing was really blocked. I worried as I cut back the branches that it might be too late for such work, that I might damage the bushes by doing this. In the end, I thought that that might, in fact, be a blessing.

In between the first and the second bushes -- lunch and a concert.

K and L spent most of the day inside, cleaning, cleaning, cleaning. Cleaning clothes, floors, bathrooms, and anything else that would sit still long enough. In the end, though, K had to come out: her garden beckoned.

"When will we ever have a relaxed Saturday?" K asked as we sat on the front steps watching the kids, who still had energy, play in the front yard.

"A relaxed Saturday? What's that?"

After-Dinner Play

After dinner, everyone went out to practice sports.

The Girl finished her second day of tryouts today, and she came home feeling pessimistic about her chances of making the team. But did she give up? No way. On the way home, she and K stopped by the Y and signed her up for youth volleyball. And after dinner, she was out practicing an overhand serve as well as her underhand serve.

“You really should master the underhand first,” I suggested.

“I know, but this is what we were working on during tryouts today,” she replied.

The Boy finished soccer this weekend, but he’s still keen on practicing. For a while there, I was tossing the ball to L for her to practice passing and trying to kick the ball back to the Boy.

Occasionally, the two activities almost collided.

Finally, the Boy, exhausted, took a break

and then gave me some tree-climbing lessons.

Monday

A few Two random thoughts from the day:

The Girl is trying out for volleyball. She started working on her skills Saturday after having bought a ball that morning.

"How did it go?" I asked when I got home.

"I was the worst one there," came the simple reply.

It turned out that it was a two-day tryout session, and so I immediately wondered if she'd be discouraged from her first experience and say, "I don't have a chance of making the team. I don't want to go to the second day." And I was wondering how I might handle that. Is it something I should make her do in the interest of building character -- following through on what you set out to do and all that? Or should we just let it go?

Turns out, the dilemma never presented itself: after gymnastics, she asked if we could go practice volleyball for a few minutes.

Second thought: While the Girl was in volleyball, I did some shopping, and I went through the self-checkout lane when I was done. If they'd had these things in Poland twenty years ago, I might not have stayed. It was tough, those first weeks; it was especially tough making friends when I didn't speak the language. The store saved me. No self-service there: no, just a counter and a packed shelf behind it, with a sales clerk between you and your merchandise. So I had to ask for every single item. Which led to funny mistakes and misunderstandings. Which led to laughter. Which led to friendships.

 

End of Spring 2018 Soccer

The Boy finished his second season of soccer. It was a successful season, no doubt. Talking to the coach during Monday's practice, I heard the kind of praise about one's child that parents dream of. "He's really got something," he said. "He plays thoughtfully. He watches. He thinks. He doesn't just barge in. He waits for a moment." This jives with E's own description of his strategy: "I just run around the edge [of the pack of children all trying to gain access to the ball] and wait for a good moment."

(Click on the images for a larger view.)

After the game, spring planting. The Girl decided she wanted to help. Wanted to drive the stakes that will hold our simple borders in place. Wanted to rake the soil one last time. Wanted to put the young plants in the ground.

(Click on the images for a larger view.)

The Boy, just having woken up from a nap, had to fight for his right to drive a few stakes in...

Friday Afternoon and Evening

Spring Evening

Soccer and the New Garden

Every kid needs a break-out game, a moment when he shines like a professional player who hits the grand slam in the bottom of the ninth to overcome a three-run deficit or scores the winning goal in overtime. E had his today. The first half was relatively calm. No score, no real threats. The big scorer from a couple of weeks ago couldn't work his magic, and although E's team kept the ball in the opponent's half of the field most of the time, they'd been unable to convert anything to a goal.

In the beginning of the third quarter (little kids' soccer is divided into quarters, not halves), E broke out of the pack of kids that always hovers around the ball, drove down half the field, and scored. All the parents were cheering for him as he broke through, and I sat thinking, "Please, let him make this. It could change everything." It wasn't that I was thinking about winning the game. I just knew that such a spectacular play could really boost his confidence. Shortly after that, he did it again. High fives from everyone. A big smile from the Boy.

During the fourth quarter, the Boy initially sat. He was not at all upset about it: he was panting, sweaty, and positively glowing. A few minutes into the quarter, though, one of the boys on E's team wandered off the field and decided he didn't want to play anymore.

"E!" the coach called out. We found him practicing in the area by the field and sent him back in. "Come on, superstar," said our tough-love coach.

The fourth quarter saw a turnaround. Twice a player from the other team broke through; twice the Boy chased the opponent down and got in front of him/her to try to stop the goal; twice the opponent scored on the Boy. He'd been trying each time to get far enough ahead of the attacker to turn and defend like a goalie (we don't play with goalies at this level), and there was just not enough time for him to make the transition.

So instead of winning 2-0 it was a 2-2 tie. Perhaps that's better. The Boy was still the star and everyone went home happy.

No pictures, though, because I left the camera at home. "Ah, we have tons of pictures from this year," I mumbled as we walked out.

The rest of the day we spent at home. Tilling, raking, spreading manure, peat moss, and compost, tilling again. It was an exhausting but rewarding day.

After School Friday

I come home from school some Fridays, and I only want to do one thing: get the grading done for the weekend. Those Fridays are very few and infrequent. In fact, I can’t remember the last time I’ve done that. In fact, I’ve been leaving my weekend grading (articles of the week, anyway) at school to work through Monday and Tuesday.

Other Fridays, I come home and help K with the cleaning. She’s always trying to get the bathrooms done Friday afternoon because she has enough work in the house Saturday that any dint will help.

Sometimes, I come home to find everyone in the backyard. I make a cup of coffee and join them.

Today, I came home and mowed. With a soccer game tomorrow and plans to remake our garden, albeit, in a new location, I knew mowing might be tricky tomorrow, so I got the mower out while K made dinner, and much to my surprise, I got it all done before dinner. Well, the front yard, anyway.

After dinner, a quick trip to Home Depot to pick up a tiller to break the ground for our new garden. The Boy chatted up the sales clerk as he tried to show me how to operate the machine, and he was ready to load the thing himself until he heard how loud it was.

“Maybe I can get the first tilling done before we head to the game in the morning,” I’d said during dinner, but when the Boy and I got back and, with a bit of help from our neighbor, got the tiller unloaded, I decided, “Why wait?”

“Hey, E, want to do some tilling?”

He dropped what he was doing and ran for his work boots.

We walked up and down the stretch of lawn by our driveway — the sunniest place on our lot except for the front yard — several times, with a couple of breaks for the Boy to empty his boots.

Once we were all done, the Boy had one request, one simple desire: “Daddy, can I run in the dirt without shoes?”

And then he stepped on a rock…