matching tracksuits

At the day treatment facility where I work, we use the Teaching Family Model (see Teaching Family Association), a method of behavior modification that at first seems a little silly, but becomes more reasonable the more I work with it.

Basically, it’s point system, with each student (or “consumer” in the social services parlance) having a point card, which staff members use to help the consumer (really, I hate that term; what is being consumed?) keep track of beneficial and detrimental behaviors. Basically, for doing something good, they earn positive points, and that word choice is critical — we’re not to say we “give” them the points. For doing something negative, they earn negative points.

“Bob, I really liked the way you took the initiative when you saw the trash needed to be taken out. Take your point card out, please. I think you’ve earned a thousand points for that.”

“Sam, I need you to take your point card out. You know that using profanity is socially unacceptable, and can really lead to a bad impression of you as an individual in many situations. I need you to take of four thousand points for swearing…”

The points are then used as a gauge for moving up through the treatment levels, each of which requires more responsibility, but also has more privileges.

Usually, we staff members tie their points into their individual goals for the day, or their general program goals. That way we’re reinforcing the same basic things, rather than assessing random behavior.

“It all seems so artificial,” I initially thought. “People don’t go through life with point cards.” But watching the behaviors the students (I’m their teacher — I shall call them “students”! What assertiveness…) struggle with, I came to a different conclusion.

While no one carries point cards in the “real world,” we do go through our day assessing points mentally. If we meet someone who reluctantly holds out his hand when he meets us, weakly shakes our hand, mumbles, and refuses to make eye contact, we assign that individual negative points in our mind, consciously or not. On the other hand, meeting someone who seems gifted in conversation and immediately draws us to him/her racks up positive points. That’s what “making a good impression” is: positive points on our mental score card.

Making points depends on following the rules of society, which has “decided” that certain things are acceptable, others are not. Yet many of the students I work with are not aware of these rules — the rules of the game, one might say.

Soon after I’d started working at the facility, I was having a conversation with another staff member in the presence of the students, and the student butted in to tell me how I was wrong, how what I was saying was stupid, and how anyone with any sense would no better. Now, his tone was not overtly disrespectful, but his interruption certainly was, as was what he actually said. When I told him to give himself negative points for being disrespectful, he was genuinely puzzled, not to mention angered. A heated discussion almost ensued. Instead, we were able to calm him and explain that, while he might not have intended any disrespect by it, I felt it was disrespectful. “And unfortunately,” I explained, “disrespect doesn’t depend solely on the definition of the speaker, but also — more so, even — it depends on the definition of the listener.”

The Teaching Family Model’s point card system simply tries to make students aware of the mental point assessment that’s going on all around them. It’s intended to help them keep a positive score on the mental scorecard of those in authority.

Whether it works or not, I can’t say. Much of it depends on consistency. Perhaps key, though, is making sure the students don’t see point deductions as punishment, which is much more difficult than it might seem. Privileges depend on the number of points a student might have. There are “gates” at our program, thought they might be described as levels. With each gate come more privileges, as well as more responsibilities. Moving up to the next gate, in turn, depends on having a certain number of cumulative points. This is certainly not the only thing necessary to move up a gate, but it is an important facet. To gain points, a student must be consistently improving his social skills. Thus, taken altogether, it’s easy to see how students view a point deduction as a punishment. It’s too abstract for some of them to think of the staff as simply score keepers working within a framework imposed, even on us, from the outside.

When someone is intensely insecure and lacking self-confidence, anything–and often, everything–can be an insult. Just looking at someone can bring about such an astounding level of posturing. So can accidentally stepping on toes attached to feet at the end of legs stretched out into what might otherwise be considered a row between desks.

Many of the kids I work with can so quickly switch into the posturing mode that it’s difficult to keep track of all the triggers. Indeed, the “triggers” are often arbitrary. That’s not to say I (and other staff members) walk around on egg shells, but there are times when avoiding confrontation is in the best interests of all.

A posturing student is a student who is not receptive, and the question arises, “What to do?” Do I let the little tantrum run itself out, or do I put a stop to it immediately, knowing that that might escalate it? Any number of factors play into this decision:

• Is this exceptional behavior for this student?
• Is this disrupting other students?
• Could other students join in and thus escalate it?
• What are the students doing next (i.e., can I just let it run its course if it gets out of hand)?
• What am I trying to accomplish with the student?
• Is there another staff member near who can help with the other students if this behavior takes all of my attention?

And then there are the inappropriate factors, the things that run through my head that I really shouldn’t take into account, but probably do more often than I should.

• Do I have the energy to continue doing this?
• Can I just let this simmer down and let whoever is working with this student next deal with it?
• Is lunch soon?
• Is there any coffee in the coffee pot?
• Do I have to do anything with this student later in the day that will require him being unusually compliant with me?

All these things bouncing around my head, and all I really want to say gently, is “Be still. Be calm. There’s no reason to be upset.”

But to whom would I be speaking?