Someone -- the administration I would assume -- has put the kids up to writing end-of-the-year notes to various teachers.
The next day, I told her, "That's about the sweetest thing any student has ever done."
Letter
Boys’ Afternoon
What do you do when the Girl is off with Nana and Papa (or "Papa-Nana" as the boy calls them) and Mama is not scheduled to come back until a full hour after her usual time? What are two boys to do? Playing with cars is a definite must, including lining them up, rearranging that lineup, and directing the Older Boy to play with this one, not that one while the Older Boy tries desperately to provide the Boy with yet another opportunity to practice sharing.
Dipping your bread into your soup when there's no one else to give you dirty looks -- well, K wouldn't do that anyway, but that doesn't sound as good -- is another must.
Yoko
Not sure I need to add anything to this.
Terrace by Rain
The heavy rain of Sunday
produced a mini-terraced backyard.
Fortunately, it didn’t result in a flood like a year ago.
Monday
They're usually just awful, Mondays, though I have a theory that Tuesday is in fact the worst day of the week. Yet sometimes, Mondays are not all that bad at all.
But getting to that moment was a long story, beginning with a morning of work: I spent the morning in the raised beds; L spent the morning cleaning her room, with K and E supervising and occasionally helping (and likely, knowing E, occasionally setting L back a few minutes or more).
The morning drifted into afternoon. L brought out more and more stuff -- literally, there is no better word sometimes -- to toss in the garbage while I spread cardboard over the open areas of our covered beds and covered all that with leaves (a highly effective way, we've discovered, to keep down weeds and retain moisture), and soon it was time to get the grill going, for what is Memorial Day without meat cooked on an open flame. And while you're at it, go ahead and throw the corn on the grill. And for good measure, the potatoes.
Once the dishes were in the sink and the kids were left munching on their leftovers and newly delivered watermelon, the real photographic fun began.
We passed around the little camera -- such a perfect camera for black and white shots -- and once L got hold of it, I rushed in for the Beast Camera, tempted to raid our collection of antique and semi-antique cameras as props.
But who needs props when you've got kids?
Sick Sunday
Sick Saturday
The Boy always stays sick. Or is it a dairy allergy? At any rate, he’s always coming down with something, and so when we took him to the doctor ten days ago, this weekend’s plans wobbled just a little: “He might not be up to camping,” K said. I was optimistic, though: “He’ll get better.” But as he was getting better, K started feeling worse. “Perhaps you and L can go on the camping trip instead of all four of us,” she suggested. Then Wednesday, L returned home from school feeling positively awful and slept from four to seven, then went back to bed at nine and slept till seven the next morning. Three out of four, that meant only one thing: Tata has to step up his game.
Cleaning, diaper changing, cut bandaging, medicine dosing — I usually miss these things on a spring Saturday morning. This or that gardening/hardware/tool store is calling, or the lawn beckons, or the Leyland cypresses stretch out to remind me they need a trimming. It’s always something. This morning, though, it was just an ever-running laundry, new adventures with a fussy son, a cat in the laundry basket, and cold coffee.
Enough to make me appreciate again all the things that K accomplishes inside while I’m outside on a Saturday.
By the early afternoon, the kids had both rebounded almost fully. The Boy and I went on a little field trip while L was up the street at a friend’s house. By the evening, K was once again exhausted — she insisted on cooking dinner — and the kids were tired from their newly-rediscovered outside freedom.
“Water!”
Invitation
Ashley Madison sent me an email some time ago. I don’t really know Ashley, so I was surprised she was contacting me. “What could this be about?” I wondered as I opened the email. I quickly discovered that Ashley was offering me a chance to betray all I believe in, to betray my wife, to betray my children, to betray my community, and above all, to betray my conscience. More fundamentally, in doing all of that, I would, in an echo of one of the most the paradoxical Christian ideas, both initially and ultimately betray God.
Ashley’s letter began,
Join our Married People’s Dating community right now and we GUARANTEE that you will have a sexual affair with a married woman or man! We GUARANTEE this!
Press here if you want to have an affair with a married woman or man.
I wondered for a moment about all the stresses an affair would entail. There’s the guilt, of course, of betraying the person you’re supposed to be closest to, the guilt of betraying God, the guilt of betraying your children, your parents. Then there’s all the stress of discovery: this is something that must be kept secret, so the unfaithful partner needs to scrutinize every little act, every little word, every single facial expression to make sure not to betray oneself.
Ashley, though, pointed out another way being unfaithful can increase stress:
Having an affair can be stressful because you never know if the other person involved is going to get attached to you. You just want the “sexual activity” and nothing else.
“What a great point!” I thought. It’s bad enough that you’ve already got someone attached to you, someone who expects you to be faithful and honest with her. What could be more stressful than people expecting this of you?
Fortunately, Ashley had a solution:
The BEST thing about our DISCREET dating community is that you will only meet up with people just like you that DO NOT want a commitment, just a sexual relationship.
Still, I wasn’t convinced. I mean, that’s money we’re talking about. What if someone signs up for this web site and then can’t manage to have an affair? What a tragedy! All that money and time wasted. On the other hand, you might meet someone who’s only playing some kind of game — more money and time wasted. Fortunately, Ashley once again came to the rescue:
Here is why you should join today if you want to have an affair with a married person, or if you’re married and want to have an affair:
- You can check it out, see if you like it, and then begin contacting married people for secret intimate encounters.
- We GUARANTEE that you will have a sexual relationship with a married woman or man!
- Our dating community is 100 percent DISCREET, and you will not have to worry about someone getting attached to you!
What a relief — my biggest concern in having an affair of course would be that the woman I’m having the affair with might actually think it’s something serious, that she might not realize that a man who can’t be faithful to his own wife certainly couldn’t be faithful to a mistress. I was so relieved that Ashley saw this concern immediately.
The letter ended with a simple question:
There are thousands of unhappy married women and men in every city, but they DO NOT want to leave their spouse. They want to stay married, but they want to have an affair without ever being caught. Our dating community is PERFECT for these people. Are you one of them?
All sarcasm aside, no, I am not one of them Ashley. If I were unhappily married, I would try something novel, like talking to my wife about it, like getting counseling, like being honest. I would ask myself a simple question: “Am I not happy because my wife is not happy?” In other words, I would consider whether I was the root cause of it all.
I guess Ashley wouldn’t, which is why I feel for her, but most of all, I feel sorry for whomever she claims to be committed.