matching tracksuits

fun in threes, sometimes fours

the girl

Jazz at Furman

Furman University, a private college just north of Greenville and home of the quasi-famous bell tower by the lake, has a summer concert series we’ve just discovered. It’s not Boston Pops on the Esplanade, but for a college of less than 3,000 undergrads, it’s an impressive schedule.

The Tower

Last night, we went for the jazz program.

Low

We’ve become increasingly fascinated with jazz over the last few years, so L hears quite a fair amount of it at home and in the car. It’s never among her requests — she’s particularly fascinated with Counting Crows’ music — but she does listen and bob her head about occasionally.

Performers

Last night, she simply danced. A little. Generally, she was having more fun throwing Baby down the little embankment where we’d spread our blanket, running to get it, and repeating.

Dancing GIrl

She did calm down for the ballads.

Ballad

Igor Stravinsky said, “My music is best understood by children and animals.” L seems to understand music on some very primal level: it makes her want either to jump about or to sit calmly. It’s rarely merely “there.” It almost always provokes some kind of reaction.

The Stage

In an informal atmosphere such as this, that’s just about perfect. Space to dance, an informal mood that doesn’t require silence, well-performed music — what could could a two-and-a-half year old want?

Dry

Six mornings in a row the Girl has had a completely dry diaper. We attribute this to four nights of waking up around midnight, hearing L crying out for the potty.

The new ritual is well established now. I stumble to the guest bathroom for the potty chair as quickly as I can while half asleep: I don’t want L to wake up any more than she has to. The real adventure begins in her room, for she’s often still partially or completely asleep. And she can fall back asleep at several points in the process. She has dozed off while

  • I take her out of the crib;
  • I lean her against me to take off her diaper;
  • she sits on the potty;
  • I put her diaper back on; and,
  • I put her back in the crib.

One night last week, she drifted off during four out of those five times.

“It’s time to start planning the final step of potty training,” I say to K over breakfast. There are the obvious things: a switch to training pants; a re-make of the crib; several nights of helping L get out of the bed and trundle off to the potty. There is an enormous potential pitfall, too, and a very literal one at that: our guest bathroom is just at the top of a short flight of stairs down to the kitchen.

Now that all the gates and barriers in the house are long gone, it’s time to start thinking about putting up new ones, which is sort of what parenting is all about: creating boundaries that (ideally) keep little hands safe but not restricted. Those gates will soon be much less literal, though.

The Wisdom of Seuss

An occasional selection for my nightly bedtime reading with L is One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish. She sits on my lap, commenting on pictures, asking with every pause, “Turn the page?” We make our way slowly through the book — it’s not one we read often and she can’t recite any passages from rote as I read, like she can with Fox in Socks or Green Eggs and Ham.

I’m always taken aback at the appropriateness of the ending:

Today is done.
Today was fun.
Tomorrow is another one. …

If we could only keep that in mind daily.

Swimming III

We took L for her first swimming lessons when she was six months old. She loved it. Then through some kind of osmosis, she began taking on the fear of the kids around her, I think, and by the end of the series of lessons, she wasn't wild about swimming.

Last summer, she still clung to her anxieties: we really didn't go often as a result.

This summer, it's a different girl with us in the pool.

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This makes for different parents in the water, as well.

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It has, in short, become a family affair. L floats; L slashes; L jumps -- and we have to be there for it all. And that's not just the parental pride; it's L's request.

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"Hey guys!" she likes to call out, "Watch me!"

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The clearest indicator of how her attitude toward the water has changed is her willingness to jump excitement about jumping.

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Again, and again, and again, only occasionally losing her nerve.

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Nothing deters her, not even a face full of water. Not even a face entirely under water.

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All of this is both gratifying (it's great to see her overcoming her fear) and terrifying (it's sometimes heart-stopping to watch her overcoming her fear). During a visit last week, she was being silly at the water's edge and fell in. I was ten to fifteen feet away, so I swam there in a matter of moments. But those moments seemed eternal as she bobbed about in the water, unable to get her head out of the water, clearly terrified.

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Another object lesson in the obvious: parenting isn't about holding tight, but it is about being close by when those tight embraces are necessary.

First Parade

I don’t know if I’ve ever been in a parade. If I have, I don’t remember it. That might be the case with L thirty-plus years from now, but we’ll remember it, K and I: L’s school had a parade yesterday.

There was a pre-parade performance/cheer,

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with a Cycling Corps actually leading the parade in (with one or two very wise little girls in helmets),

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followed by some marchers complete with banners,

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followed by the youngest toddlers’ escort.

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L’s group was the very last, with L marching as something of a walking Statue of Liberty.

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“Don’t let her see you,” K suggested before the parade began. “She’ll want to leave her group and come over to us.” Perhaps it was an unnecessary concern, for she marched past us with a big smile and obvious pride, and continued marching.

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She was somewhat intrigued by her own shadow, though.

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A photographer was there with a rather substantial collection of equipment, obviously a pro or a rich amateur: anyone with two Nikon D3 bodies…

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Finally, everyone gathered at the base of the flag to sing “You’re a Grand Old Flag,” I guess to the flag. It seemed strangely idolatrous and sweet at the same time.

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A picnic followed, with L continuing her usual aversion to meat. No hot dog for her, thank you — just a bun.

What’s in a name?

I’m not sure how I got into the habit of referring to those closest to me by their initials: “L” for “Lena,” “K” for “Kinga.” Perhaps it was a sense of anonymity for those who don’t know us personally, but we don’t get many of those kind of visitors. Still, it’s a stylistic choice, one which I will continue.

Except for this post.

“Lena,” I also learned after naming our daughter, is a famous picture: “The Lenna (or Lena) picture is one of the most widely used standard test images used for compression algorithms.” (Source)

When Lena was still an unimaginably large bump in Kinga’s belly, we weren’t sure what to name her. We’d thought about naming her after her Polish grandmother, Janina. Yet, knowing the difference in pronunciation of “j” in Polish and English (It’s “y” as in “yeah” in Polish, for the uninitiated), we opted out due to the tendency everyone would have to mistakenly mispronounce her name. (The irony is, they still do it with “Lena,” for most want to pronounce it with a long “ee.”)

Our next choice was Amelia, but we were hesitated.

It was at this point, I believe, that Kinga suggested Lena, and I liked the name immediately. We settled on “Lena” fairly quickly once Kinga suggested it.

It had all the qualities we were looking for in a name:

  1. It was strong and feminine.
  2. It could be easily pronounced by Americans (a criterion which quickly would have ruled out Wladyslawa, Malgorzata, and most definitely Zdzislawa, had they been in the running).
  3. It was fairly uncommon but didn’t have that made-up feel. “I only know one ‘Lena,’ from college,” Kinga informed me.

The most uncommon name I’ve heard of is “La-a,” which is alternately spelled “Le’a.” It’s pronounced “Ladasha.” (The alternate spelling might also be pronounsed “Laapastrophea” or “Lainvertedcommaa.”) I’ve heard this is an urban legend, but Google “La-a” and you’ll get baby name site results for “La-a.”

Now, though, Lenas are popping up like mushrooms after a storm. Two of our friends have since named their daughters Lena; a friend who works in the hospital tells us that there are a lot of Lenas in the maternity ward.

And the same is true for Amelia. Very, very popular.

Part of me wants to say we were simply on the cutting edge of naming. By it also seems to hint at some kind of hidden current in societies that suggests things that bubble up slowly. After all, we only know two of the multitude of families who’ve opted for “Lena,” so the phenomenon can’t be attributed to our influence, as flattering as that might be.

K is frustrated. (The old habit returns…) “If we had another daughter, I’d want to name her ‘Amelia.'” And now we can’t.

Zdzislawa is looking better and better…

There’s also the LENA language system and a rock star in New York, not to mention the famous Polish/Czech Lenka pop star, and the Australian Lenka actress/pop singer.

A parallel thought to this is how children seem to grow into their names. Lena is a Lena. There’s no other name that seems to fit her, just like Madeline is Madeline. The name “Lena” is short and energetic, strong and joyful, single-minded; the girl Lena is short and energetic, strong and joyful, single-minded. “Amelia” would never fit Lena, and “Janina” is a worse match still.

When I was in college, I tried to go by my middle name, Lawrence. At the time, it somehow sounded more intellectual, more serious, than “Gary.” The trouble was, I could never remember that I was Lawrence. I gave up after one semester and took to heart how ingrained our names become.

Which makes me wonder about Bono, Eminem, Sting, Prince, Moby, Twiggy, Dido, Goldie, Cher, Lulu, Pink, and Seal. Do they so identify with their stage names that they prefer them to their real name? Do Sting’s closest friends call him “Sting” or “Gordon?” Does Bono go by “Paul” when the band is recording? And Prince — that’s a case all by itself.

So was Shakespeare right? Yes and no. Lena is not “Amelia,” though if we’d named her Amelia, I would be have reversed those names…

Good grief! That’s amazing and super cool!

 

Madeline

Classic opening lines:

In an old house in Paris that was covered with vines,
lived twelve little girls in two straight lines.
They left the house at half past nine [...]
The smallest one was Madeline.

Madeline is fast becoming one of L's favorites. We only own one book (Madeline's Christmas), but we've borrowed several from the library, all of them hits. And what's not to love about them? Lovely stories and a recurring theme: don't judge by appearances.

Lately, L's been fascinated with the Madeline cartoon. So far as adaptations go, these cartoons are wonderful. Christopher Plummer as the narrator has a warm, grandfatherly voice.

It seems to worm its way into your heart and stay there:

This show hasn't been popular since I was in kindergarten. I am almost thirteen now, and sometimes, when I am up late, I stumble across "Madeline" on the Disney channel. I loved this show when I was little and I wonder why they don't show it at times when little children can see it. It's a lot better than the junk they show on "Playhouse Disney" these days. (Koala Bros., Higglytown Heroes, etc.) If they could bring this show back, it would be just as popular, if not, more than it once was. I think that Madeline had a big influence on children between the ages of two to six. Heck, I would still watch it. I hope to see Madeline on Disney Channel really soon. (IMDb)

The best part: the theme song. We're all going around singing it.

Drawing on the Drive

All this time we’ve had the chalk and yet, to my memory, we’ve never used it for what it’s intended.

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Sure, one can make the argument that chalk was invented for chalk boards.

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As a teacher in Poland, I made my fair use of the chalkboard, coming back to the teachers’ room with my hands covered with chalk. Chalk dust on my clothes, on my shoes, everywhere.

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Yet I never understood that Edward J. Chalkster (or whoever the inventor) really intended chalk for entertainment, not pedagogy.

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Had I known, I certainly would have lodged a protest: chalk abuse. Chalk misuse.

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“It’s for outside use only!” I might have protested.

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“It is, above all else, intended for one, single, aerobic function.”

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Hop-scotch.

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Now we all know. I don’t think it will be the last time. This week.

Downtown Asheville

We left the mountains of Madison County late Sunday morning and headed to Asheville, our home of two years.

Such an odd place, Asheville.

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1/400, f/10.0, 10 mm

When we decided to move to Asheville, a quirky friend of the family warned us that there is a lot of Wiccan activity going on in Asheville and that we might want to rethink our decision. I'm not sure what she was expecting: fields of Wicca-ness that float about the city, turning unsuspecting passersby into pagans, but there is a different atmosphere there. In the heart of the mountains, not more than fifty miles from the rhinestone on the buckle of the Bible belt that is Bob Jones University (here in Greenville), Asheville is a hippy-filled, laid back, liberal island.

The Girl fell asleep during the drive so we drove by the apartment complex where we lived.

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August 2005

Changes -- three new buildings, and the whole complex feels, well, cheaper. The old buildings were brick veneer and looked a little classy; new buildings show the cheap way out: one-third brick, two-thirds siding. It's so crowded and sprawling. It was not the place we moved into almost four years ago.

We headed downtown when the Girl woke up, doing a little window shopping on the way. "I want some!" L cried when we saw slab of fudge and explained to her just what it was. For a girl who didn't like sweets for a very long time, she has grown positively obsessive about them.

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1/160, f/6.3, 10 mm

Our time in Asheville was not meant to be idle sight seeing. We had a goal: buy a apartment-warming/wedding gift for dear friends of ours in Warsaw. We went to the galleries in the Grove Arcade.

The building never ceases to fascinate: built in 1924-29 by Edwin Wiley Grove, who also built the Grove Park Inn. It was a bustling little place until the Second World War, when everyone was evicted and the building converted to wartime use. In the 1970's it served as the National Climatic Data Center. When my family would visit Asheville in the late 1980's and early 1990's, the building was vacant but alluring. It reopened in 2002, filled with shops and restaurants.

Unfortunately, said shops had nothing for us, and we already had lunch plans, so the restaurants went unnoticed. (I don't think we ever ate there in our two years in Asheville, in fact.)

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1/200, f/7.1, 10 mm

We went to the Kress Emperium, where we attempted to sell our photos. We had been hoping to make enough money eventually to buy a digital SLR. Our lack of sales and the monthly rent turned opportunity into irony: we simple lost enough money to buy a digital SLR. Still, it's better to have tried and failed than never to have tried at all.

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1/80, f/4.5, 10 mm

We went to Woolworth Walk, which, as it sounds, is an old Woolworth store converted into galleries. Still, nothing. In the end, K had a brilliant idea, but it required being in Greenville.

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1/320, f/9.0, 19 mm

Yet all was not lost: we got an old fashioned milkshake at Woolworth Walk; we got our fill of lesbians (of which Asheville has an enormous population; maybe that's what the Wicca force fields do!); and the Girl got to run about a bit.