Matching Tracksuits

fun in fours

Month: February 2020

Decisions

There was supposed to be a horrible storm coming through the area. Or there was the possibility of a terrible storm. Or at least the potential for bad conditions that might make driving unsafe for those unaccustomed to wintery weather. Or something like that. Here in the south, we have snow days without any actual snow because the district calls off school if the forecast is bad. That’s not an exaggeration.

Now, I’m not complaining about this. The district is looking out for its students’ safety when making these decisions, and to some degree minimizing the potential for lawsuits as well. That’s cynical, that last comment, but I don’t mean to be terribly cynical: I do honestly believe the schools have their students’ safety in mind.

The real fun comes in looking at social media reactions to this. Today, for example, the district implemented an early dismissal and the Facebook announcement has almost 700 comments, many of which leave one feeling a little hopeless for humanity:

20 Years Ago, Chinese New Year

Twenty years ago this month, I headed to Chinatown in Boston on a Saturday morning with several coworkers to video, photograph, and interview participants in the community’s Chinese New Year celebration.

We were all working for Digital Learning Group, shortened to DLG in conversation, which would soon be rebranded DLI (Digital Learning Interactive), a company making interactive textbooks for college courses. This was 2000 — pre-social media, pre-almost-everything-we-call-the-internet-today. There was really innovative thinking behind that company, but we all seemed to be figuring it out as we went along.

I volunteered to take photos, and I didn’t even have a digital camera at the time. I took my Nikon FG, my best lense, and a lot of optimistic hope on that photoshoot.

My job had nothing to do with technology at that time, though. A graduate student in philosophy of religion, I’d been hired as the editor for the intro to religious studies book that was just under development.

At the time, I was studying at Boston University and writing things like this in my journal:

I’ve been reading Durkheim for class next week and I have to admit that he’s a little frustrating. I sometimes feel as if he takes me on great, circular arguments that assume points vital to that which he is trying to prove. For example, he talks about the fact that society needs an ideal to create itself (Elementary Forms of Religious Life 422), yet he’s not quite clear whence comes this ideal. He seems to indicate that it comes from the sacred/profane distinction, hinting at some kind of epiphany the believer experiences during some religious ritual. Yet whence comes the sacred/profane distinction? As I understand Durkheim, this comes from society. Yet religion, he indicates, in a way gives birth to society (418). In fact, religion and society are all but indistinguishable, yet he uses one to discuss/prove the other, and then a few pages later, the other to prove the first. It’s incredibly annoying.

We honestly really didn’t know how we were going to use the material: we had authors creating content for the sections on Islam, Christianity, and Judaism, but nothing for eastern religions.

The author for our Judaism section was Jacob Neusner, who sent in a 50+ page resume. At that time, he had 500 book publications to his name, and by the time he passed in 2016, had over 900 books published. How on earth did he do that? I wrote about it in my journal:

That seems completely impossible — five hundred books? I think he was born in the 30’s; finished his grad work in the 60’s. That gives him forty years of academic life. But let’s say he began writing as undergrad, when he was twenty. So that’s fifty years, which comes up to ten books a year, or a book every 36.5 days. That has got to be a slight misrepresentation; it has to include books he’s edited and such.

I can attest to the man’s speed: I was unable to keep up with editing his work while he wrote it. He sent in a new chapter every couple of days, and because I was working on a number of other projects, I was taking about a week per chapter.

I look back on that time, and I don’t recognize myself. I read my journal from that time — I was still writing daily — and I don’t see myself in my concerns. That’s always the case, I guess.

Still, I enjoyed working that job. I enjoyed being part of the .com explosion, of working on something that seemed so innovative.

Ultimately, though, I quit the job. Poland had sunk its hooks in me more deeply than I’d initially realized. I was getting letters from students (“Czy mogłabym pisac do Pana po polsku, bo wiem, że jak piszę po angielsku to robię dużo będów i Pan się może denerwuje czytając list z takimi bądami.”) and finding that I missed it all so terribly.

Plus, by then I’d moved to the tech side and was getting great money for essentially making a computer jump through hoops. I was learning much but accomplishing little, I felt.

Now, twenty years later, I’m back in America with a big slice of Poland here with me, teaching again, feeling like it was all so inevitable, this path I’ve taken.

Tuesday Evening

Savannah, Day 3

During the first match today, the girls slipped out of the convention center, found ten girls roughly their same age, gave them their volleyball uniforms, and sent them in to play. Which is to say they played poorly, losing in straight sets 25-14 and 25-15.

What happened there? Nothing that hasn't happened before: they seem to do poorly on the first match of the day. They last their first two on Saturday before winning one on Saturday and the only two they played on Sunday.

And their second match today? They won in straight sets: 25-19 and 25-13. They're not the only ones that fall apart, it seems.

Afterward, we went for a walk in Savannah. We couldn't do this yesterday because it was raining -- what a shame, we both thought. We made up for it today, probably doing three miles in the loveliest city in the South.

Savannah, Day 2

Yesterday started poorly; it ended with a lithe of hope. We lost the first two games; we won the third game.

Today, we won our two matches and finished before lunch. Tomorrow, we play three more games and refereed one more. (I went for a walk around the venue while they ran the game.)

Why only two games today? Simple: it's a pay-to-play tournament, which means we had to stay in a hotel from a list provided by the tournament organizers, who get a kick-back from the hotels. It's in their best interest to stretch things out as much as possible: the longer we have to stay here, the more they make.

Sound like a mafia-type move to you? To me, too.

Savannah, Day 1

It seems we have to start with a bang or a whimper. Our last tournament, two weeks ago, started with a bang: we won the first four matches and got second place in the gold bracket. (Does that mean we got silver? No. Why not? I don't know -- I don't even have the slightest idea how brackets are determined: it seems to be a mysterious mixture of matches won, sets won, and point differentials.) It only stands to reason, then, that we should start this tournament with a whimper: we lost the first two matches in straight sets (despite being up 16-6 at the start of the first set of the first match) and looked like we were on track to lose the first set of the third match until the girls decided finally to start communicating a little and stop playing Y ball (no offense to the YMCA).

I believe the team we beat in the final match lost all three of their matches. It looked for a while like that might be us. In a four-team bracket, I suppose there's a fairly substantial statistical possibility of this happening on a fairly regular basis depending on the skill spread of the various teams. In short, someone on days like today has to lose them all. I'm glad it's not us, but I know also how that must hurt to be the other team.

After the games and some rest, it was time for some dinner. Of course, being this near the beach, we couldn't miss the opportunity to walk on the beach for at least ten minutes.

And being this near the ocean, we couldn't not go out for seafood.

Borders, 2013 — Part 2

It was a lovely spring afternoon, and I was done with school early, so a bike ride was in order. I decided to go on one of my favorites: dip down into Slovakia that loops back to Lipnica, where I lived.

Crossing into Slovakia was no problem. I made my way around Orava Lake, through Trstena and to the border at Sucha Hora ("Dry Mountain"), where I duly handed over my passport to the border guards. The Slovak guards stamped it and gave it to the Polish guard.

"Gdzie pan mieszka?" he asked.

"I live in Lipnica," I replied.

The guard thumbed through my passport like the bloke in Mis, and then he looked at me with a puzzled look. "But how?"

At the time, I didn't have a valid work visa: I was in the process of renewing it, following all the protocols the fine folks in Krakow had laid out, and they had assured me I had nothing to worry about. And yet here I was, on the border, starting to worry.

I explained my situation to guard, but he insisted he couldn't grant me entry. "You don't have a valid visa," he said.

"Yes," I explained, "but you can't keep me out for that reason. Perhaps you could suggest I can't live and work here, but you have to let me in on at least a tourist visa, which means a stamp of the passport and off I go." I didn't say exactly that -- I used much more diplomatic terms, but that was the general idea.

"But you don't have a visa," he insisted, waking into his little office and punching some things up on the computer.

I stood there, dressed in my Lycra shorts and top for cycling, having only a bit of cash in my jersey pocket, and wondering what I would do if this guy seriously didn't let me in. A friend of mine was one of the head border guards at the Chyzne border crossing, so I thought I would just ride back there. But what if he wasn't working? How could I pull this all off? I was tired; it was nearing sunset; I had very little money. Disaster seemed just over the next hill.

The guard came back and gave me my passport, waving me through with a smile. "We'll let you through this time," he said, "but it would have been a different story for me if I were flying to America without a visa, wouldn't it?" His smile grew.

"That's what this is about," I thought. "Someone in your family -- a sister, a brother-in-law -- got turned away from the States on some technicality, and now you're having a little fun." Naturally, I said none of this. I simply thanked him, took my passport, and rode as fast as I could over the border, which was actually another half-kilometer or so from the crossing station.

In 2013, we drove through that crossing, which was empty due to Poland's and Slovakia's mutual EU membership. It looked exactly as it had a decade earlier.

Carbs

The Boy was eating dinner -- spaghetti and meatballs because of volleyball practice and the need to eat by five -- and asked if he could be excused.

"Eat a couple more bites of spaghetti," I said.

"But I ate all the meat!" he protested. "Now it's just carbs!"

"Well, you need some carbs, too."

"I've had a ton of carbs today!" he insisted. "Bread with lunch! My cereal in the morning!" A pause. "Daddy, what are carbs?"

Categories

"Daddy, can I play on my iPod?" The Boy had called my old phone that he uses for games an iPod for as long as I can remember. Sometimes he just calls hit his phone. For a seven-year-old, some details are unimportant.

"What did Mama say before she left?" I asked. I'd just gotten home, and K had just left for a showing. We like to be consistent, to make sure kids don't start playing one off the other. Not that our angels would ever do that.

"She said no YouTube and no television," he confessed.

"Well, let's generalize that to 'no electronics' and say 'No,' okay?"

"Okay." A pause. I knew what was coming. "What's 'generalize'?"

"It's when you take something specific, a detail, and make a broader category from it. Like if I were to say, 'apple' and 'orange,' what category would those both fit into?"

"Fruit!"

And there we had it.

"Daddy, can we do this for a long time? Can we play this game for a long time?"

I love how so many things become a game for him. We played the generalization game for a while, each taking turns listing two items and having the other figure out what category they fit into.

No bigger themes; no lessons learned. Just a fun little game that we might never remember to play again but got us both smiling for a few minutes today.

Progress

Working with eighth-grade kids, I've learned to accept progress in small steps. Behaviors don't change overnight. They don't even change over-week or over-month. But small changes can happen suddenly. Small changes that can grow. Small changes that serve as a foundation. Small changes that aren't so small.

I have a student that I love. And hate. And hate to love. And love to hate. He's got potential. He's got a great personality. Everyone loves him. But he talks.

Constantly.

No, constantly.

No, I mean constantly.

No, I really mean constantly.

That is almost not an exaggeration. A slight exaggeration, but only very slight. He loves gossip. He loves knowing something someone else doesn't know about someone they know in common. He loves telling people things they don't know. He loves being a clearinghouse of useless personal information about others.

In the midst of this gossiping, this chatting, this constant sharing of information, he often gets called down. And this behavior he consistently exhibits makes him the focus of teachers' attention so that they call him down for everything. And that frustrates him. Leads him to argue. Leads him to be disrespectful. Leads him to making very bad decisions sometimes.

I have him in homeroom and English class. Almost every day as he leaves, I tell him, "K, make good decisions today."

"Yes, sir," he says. (Did I mention he can be a perfect example of Southern manners?)

Later in the day, before eighth-grade students came back from related arts, I saw him again.

"K, have you been making good choices today?"

"Yes." He proceeded to tell me about an instance when a teacher called him down and told him to close his Chromebook. "I was going to argue with, but I just closed my Chromebook."

Two little actions from one decision: to do one thing and not do another. Two actions that most of us would do without thinking about it when told to do so by an authority figure. Two actions that would go unnoticed in other students. Two little actions; one little decision. And so much pride.

"See? It wasn't that hard, was it?" I said.

"No, sir."

"And the whole conflict -- it just vanished instantly, didn't it?"

"Yes, sir," he smiled.

Next step: get him to repeat it. Often.