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fun in fours

Month: December 2019

Opłatek 2019

It's the fourth year I've shared the oplatek with students here in America, which means it's the eleventh time I've shared it with students in my life. The first year we did it, I found it to be so magical that I was sure that it couldn't ever be so perfect. The kids enjoyed it more than I remember seeing thirteen-year-olds enjoy something proposed by an adult: I expecting at least some reluctance, some groans, some pushback.

Every year since then, it's been the same, though. I show them images of Wigilia in Poland, explain the sharing of the Christmas wafer, and suggest that it might be enjoyable to do it here. Some heads shake doubtfully. Most just look at me suspiciously, perhaps a little expectantly.

This year, though, I tried something new: I suggested to my journalism students, whom I teach in the final period and most of whom I've had earlier in the day for English I Honors, if they wanted to do it again. "After all," I said, "there are several in the room here who didn't do it earlier." The enthusiasm was as clear as it had been earlier in the day.

A good day to be a teacher.

Previous Years

Opłatek

Oplatek

Wigilia 2015

Watching

Down Time

13

Today we became parents of a teenager.

I sit and look at that word in wonder. “She’s thirteen,” I said to myself multiple times today. “Thirteen!”

She’s no longer interested in getting toys of any kind for her birthday. She’s no longer interested in watching cartoons. She’s no longer interested in so many things that once meant the world to her.

Now she watches Grey’s Anatomy and advises K on make-up brands. She picks apart K’s and my words, looking for semantic loopholes — “But you said…” — and no longer turns up her nose at movie recommendations coming from me.

She’s as tall as K now, as stubborn as anyone we know, as sweet as a thirteen-year-old can be (and that age can be incredibly sweet — I wouldn’t have worked with thirteen-year-olds for as long as I have if it weren’t for that). She’ll stay up as late as we allow (probably later), sleep as long as we let her, and fuss at the silliest things — just like a teenager, I guess.

She’s more beautiful than we could have expected, more aggravating than we would have wished, funnier than we deserve, and often sweeter than honey.

Except when she’s not

Which means she’s officially a teenager.

Jaselka 2019

The Polish community in the area has a mass on the last Sunday of every month, but just before Christmas, there's a special mass. We've done it every year for ten years now.

So much has changed.

Families have moved into the area and out. New families have moved from Poland; old families (at least one -- perhaps more that I don't know of, but the plural sounds better) have returned to Poland. The kids to put on the Christmas pageant in those early years are now in college; many of the kids performing now weren't even born then. We parents are all a little older, slower, wiser (?); some more cynical, some more devout; some rounder, some not. The world is a different place; our city is a different place.

Yet the pre-Christmas jasełka-centered Sunday has held steady through it all.

I count myself among those in the "more cynical" list, at least about the whole Catholic/theistic enterprise. I find myself moving more and more back to my old skeptical position, the animosity I felt toward religion returning.

Yet at its best, this is what religion provides: markers by which we can measure our lives, strengthen our communities, and share with friends.

And who could deny the beauty of the opłatek tradition?

Previous Years

Jasełka 2017

Jasełka 2016

Jasełka 2015

Six and Jaselka

Jasełka 2013

Jasełka

Performance

Jasełka

First Club Tournament

The girls had a tough day: lost everything but one set.

A learning experience, especially for L, who might have gotten a little too used to winning after an undefeated season.

Confidence

It’s a perfect set: high, gently arching. L approaches, plants her feet, throws her body into the air, and comes down just below the ball, swinging ineffectually at empty air. She jumped too early.

Timing for beginning hitters is everything. Absolutely everything. And when they get that timing perfectly, the rest of the hit becomes just that much more effective, just that much faster, just that much more forceful and intimidating. When it’s off, the hit is anything but a hit: a swat, a push, a shove, an empty swing.

The coach sees L miss so completely and shakes his head ever so slightly. He’s as frustrated as she is.

It’s moments like this that experience and confidence takes over. The truly good hitters are not put off by a miss. Something goes wrong – they shake it off and keep going. They swing as hard the next swing as they did the last swing. If the last ball goes into the net, if the last ball sails a mile out, if the last ball fell pathetically to the ground, she swings the next time as if nothing happened, as if the last hit were a blistering kill, a spike so powerful and fast that it was a mere blur of white.

The setter gives the next ball to L again. She approaches, plants her feet, throws her body into the air, and gives it a nice gentle swing. It’s deliberate yet sure to go over the net. No heat, no sting – just get it over the net. And this is where her lack of experience shows.

A few more sets come her way. The club coach has, after all, made her an outside hitter, so she’ll be getting the majority of the sets, but tonight, at this moment, it feels like targeting – the best kind of targeting. The kind that will build her confidence as she swings and swings and swings. Finally, everything aligns and the Girl takes a big swing. The ball shoots across the court and pops the floor with a bang just inside the line.

She smiles. Is that a bit more confidence I see in her smile?

Concert

Ms. R was the children's choir director for our parish for a long time. Most of L's time in the choir was under her direction, and like all the other (mostly) girls, she loved Ms. R. When she had her third child, she decided it was time to call it quits.

Shortly after that, L decided to call it quits with the choir.

Now Ms. R is back to help the girls prepare some Christmas music. This evening, they were hired to give a concert in a swanky downtown hotel...

The Card and the Project

The Boy loves Pokemon cards. We play sometimes, but I'm not sure he understands quite how to play because the way he taught me seems a little overly simplistic. But we still have fun.

For some time now he's been participating at the card trading table the teachers have set up for kids in after school. Every day he tells me about who wanted to trade what with whom, and sometimes he's frustrated because someone didn't want to make a given trade with him and other times he's upset because he didn't want to make a trade with someone -- rarely are all parties happy, I fear.

During all this trading, he's had a single-minded goal: to get some super-mega-ultra card with some ungodly number of damage points and virtual immortality. At least that what it sounds like in all his almost-hyperventilating hyperbolic descriptions.

Today, he finally managed to make that trade.

In Papa's room with his new treasure

In the evening he had to work on a project that we somehow didn't realize was a project and got swallowed up in the chaos that is our family life. He got another copy of the project and began working on it tonight.

As a teacher, I always view these things a little differently than K. I find myself sometimes judging work, thinking, "How useful is this really?" And other times I find myself thinking, "That's a great idea. I'd use that if I were an elementary school teacher." (God forbid!)

I also find myself a little less worried about our children's grades. "This might drop your grade significantly!" K fussed at the Boy this weekend when we realized what had happened. My response: "Yes, and?" Grades in elementary school are not something I worry too much about. More importantly: did we make sure the Boy learned some kind of lesson about communication and organization with this adventure? Did we learn anything?

Toilet

There are few things as satisfying as fixing something. The toilet in Papa’s guest bathroom had a leak around one of the bolts that holds the tank to the toilet itself. In the process of determining that, I also figured that the valve itself needed replacing. So a trip or two to Home Depot and everything was set.

There are few things more frustrating than thinking you’ve fixed something only to find that something else in the meantime — like a slightly too-small tank gasket — has caused an even bigger problem. A test flush resulted in virtually all the water in the tank out the sides, onto the wall to the floor.