When I moved back to America from Poland in 1999, I had a difficult time adjusting. I missed my friends in Poland; I missed my students and working with them; I missed the adventure.
It was a rough time.
Listening to the last album purchased before leaving Poland, Kayah i Bregovic, didn’t help.
Kayah is a Polish pop star; Goran Bregovic is a composer from the Balkans. An odd pairing, but effective. It became the best-selling album in Polish history, if memory serves.
You’ll find no other popular music so utterly filled with yearning as this one.
All the tracks have at the very least a ting of longing, but one drips it: “Trudno Kochac” (“Hard to Love”). Though obviously a love song, the refrain captured the duality of my feelings for Poland:
Tak trudno kochac
Lecz trudniej jest
Nie kochac wcale cie
What a summary of the love-hate relationship many of us have with Poland: difficult to love, difficult not to love.
So true. And it never resolves itself. I don’t know what it is about Poland that causes one to have such conflicted feelings. I know many immigrants suffer the loss of culture, but I think this is different. I miss it, I don’t miss it. I miss it more. Back and forth it goes.
Tesknie za Polska codziennie i wiem ze jest to jedyne miejsce na swiecie , o ktorym moge powiedziec ze go kocham
…Kayah, kiedys byla wedlug mnie najlepsza polska wokalistka teraz nie wiem bo jestem tu…i nie jestem na czasie :)
…Bregovic, najlepszy koncert na jakim bylam w zyciu, hala Wisly, Krakow , nie pamietam roku , to bylo na studiach, stalam pierwsza przy scenie z moja siostra Kasia , magia