I have a friend who once put her cat in the drier — by accident, she claims. She just closed the drier door and it started up. From the inside came howls and screeches and the odd sound of scamper, scamper, scamper thud. My friend was laughing and crying so hard, she said later, that it took her just a moment to get the door opened. Off the cat bolted, disappearing for a good long time, emotionally scarred for life.

All that is just to point out that driers can be used for things other than drying clothes.

Take calming babies, for example.

K and I had heard several couples say that the only thing that would calm their child was to put him on the drier and turn it on. Apparently the combination of motion, noise, and warmth was somehow soothing.

The other night, L in full panic mode, we decided to try it. And it worked. I put her on the pillow and blanket we’d set on the drier and she stopped instantly. It didn’t work for a long time, as evidenced by the picture: eventually she wanted her pacifier as well. But it’s good to know that, when all else fails, Maytag can save the day minute.